On Sunday afternoon the girls were playing with a castle set we own. (after we cajoled them into playing with something and stop annoying us) They were setting up walls, people, catapault, horses etc.
Miss A walked across the room to fetch another toy when she came back she said
"Oh... did I miss the war?"
The Mr and I laughed. It was so funny.
Parenting I think is similar, it may feel like a strategic war, but when looked back upon it will feel but a blink of an eye -over too quickly. I don't want to have any regrets.
I know my posts are the same old. Rehashing the same topic in a variety of different ways. I might try to stop. But honestly nothing else too exciting is happening here at the moment. The only thing happening is me thinking. Me thinking about how I am not doing enough. Yet sadly I don't do anything about it. Lazy.
I might have to ban myself from the computer. I would more than like to ban myself from cleaning and cooking instead but then we would live in an even worse mess. I need a strategy for my life! I might have to make a schedule for play time. I might have to push my kids (and me!) to go out more to play.
I feel guilt everytime my neighbour takes miss A for a walk. She walks her dog daily. Bike rides with her daughter, takes mine on walks to the river, takes her swimming, takes her hiking, taught her how to ride a bike. She doesn't allow them tv, but to creatively play (they don't do it when I ask... but if she does.. oh .. obedience...grrrrr) Ahhh the guilt I feel because I am more than happy to sit at home. (given, my neighbour only has one child, and says it is good to take mine too, to keep hers company)
I don't enjoy playing with my kids and I need to find that enjoyment. My excuse is that it is just too hot. Once it cools down a bit, we will be more active. Hopefully, but then it won't be too long till its too cold :D It seems to be ridiculous to be a stay home mum and not enjoy playing. It's crazy hard to explain cause I do like being silly and mucking around, crafting or setting up for play... I just don't like to have to direct play. Play kids....Go do it yourself.. it aint that hard is it?
Though to be kind to myself I say the first year after a baby is pretty much a write off. Often it is too hard to go many places because she is sleeping or feeding or burping. I will be kind and say that I sometimes amaze myself at being able to get out the door with four kids. I don't know how people with more than 6 would even manage it!
I'm in a war.. a strategical war.
Am I winning? I don't know. But
I don't want to miss the fight.