A wooden sign I painted, on our mantle to remind me of my parenting mantra
My children always seem to come up with hairbrained ideas at such inconvient times.
Well it seems that way. I don't know why they don't do these grand schemes between the hours of 3 -5pm - the time I've scheduled it for :) Or on lazy saturday mornings.
On Sunday Night they decided they wanted to sleep outside on the deck. Just them and their matresses.
This stressed me out and the comings and goings and planning went on and on on.
I said no because it was a school night, we'll do this type of thing on the holidays, there are mosquitoes, It just didn't feel 'safe' to me to be so exposed without your parents etc etc.
Then Daddy comes home and says yes (and gets evil glare from me)
To which he reminds me of our parenting mantra
You don't have to validate the dream, just the right to dream
plus he knew they probably wouldn't last the night out there and would be tucked in their beds before long. Which happened. He was right dang it.
I have no idea where we got this quote from, but its been our mantra for many a year now. It was either from a parenting book I'd read or Dr Phil I can't quite remember. But we've often stated it to eachother. Even if I don't agree with their ideas/dreams/musings it doesn't mean that I can't support the idea behind it.
So once again I was reminded of my choices I had made long ago that I sometimes forget.
I thought last night that when it comes to parenting and being spontaineous and creating warm memories of childhood that:
Unless it will harm their physical or spiritual health, it should probably be allowed
So when K cut out a huge dragon tail using streams of paper, tape and elastic just before company arrives. Its ok.
Or this morning when 10 mins before she had to leave for school she started making a homemade ipod. It's ok.
Validate the right to dream
validate the right to dream, validate the right to dream,validate the right to dream.... (repeat after me)
Just so when she is a parent she can say to her kids
"You think you have it tough.. when we were kids we had to MAKE our own ipods.."
7 comments:
LOL so funny. We always wanted to sleep out in the tree house at our place and we ALWAYS ended up back in our beds after a few hours. I think it's so great that you allow your girls to learn and play in such a free creative way. They will have MANY happy childhood memories and I always think of you when Lucy paints the floor ;P
haha - my boys ask all the time if they can have a sleep over together in the lounge room and I always say - on the weekend :) maybe next time I'll rethink :) Love your mantra!
and that ipod - awesome!! Perhaps you'll have to get miss K to do a tutorial on here ;)
I think you have to pick your battles. Some things we stand firm on like "no sleep overs" and no play dates on Sunday. Some battles we have lost and need to regain such as no tv on Sunday except church videos. It is hard though not to want to push ones agenda completely on our children. While I like to get homework done right as they walk in the door. My middle child I have found out that he needs a little time to decompress. The joys of having children.
oh you've still gotta have rules.
We have no tv on sundays and no tv before school and have for years.
I just meant I need to relax with the things that 'dont really matter in the long run' I think it would be sad to think 'we were never able to paint because it made a mess, never able to sleep out in the lounge etc.. .
Wasn't The Mr. supposed to back you up because you had already said no? hahaha. Sounds like I need a parenting mantra! I quite like yours!
ha they asked him as he walked in the door late afternoon sunday. He didnt know what I had said..... I talk too much to my kids so I think Im just like a broken record to them.. blah blah blah blah...
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