Happiest Girls in the World

The bunks have come out again to play! The girls are very very happy!

Actually I hope they get a little less happy. They were buzzing for hours yesterday. They spent 5 hours playing in here. They took a while to get to sleep.

I have been rearranging furniture like crazy. I had hoped that two beds would fit under the bunk. I even measured it wrong. I thought it wouldn't work, so was trying other layouts. Then I thought, I'll just check...yeah ....jackpot. I moved four beds, 2 desks, and even put the bunks together by myself in just a few hours!

The girls had shared a room when we had students. Due to Miss N's birth we haven't had students for 10 months. We  split the girls - two in each room. Twin beds in each room flat on the floor on opposite sides.

Lately they have been begging for the bunks back. I have been begging for my bedroom back.

So we gave in and put three in a room again. Miss N gets to share with the study and sewing room.

I think they like it cause of the endless cubby opportunities

I like it cause there is plenty of room for me to snuggle up with them.

Free Range

It all started off with this post I read at Crazyland .  She traveled to England alone and was left alone with younger siblings as a teen her first time to London. It reminded me of a blog that I read ages ago about a woman who let her 9 year old son ride the subway home alone from shopping in New York, on purpose. So I googled it to find it again here at Free Range Kids ( I have spent hours reading back posts. Very interesting read. Love her stuff.)

Apparently statistically children are safer today than children were in the 70's and 80's. So if you grew up playing in the street then - chances are your children will be even safer. The problem with today is terrible crimes are in the media more and played around the world. Children are  more likely to be abused by family and friends than a stranger. Even as parents chances of them being mistreated by yourself is much higher than anything else.

Now I can't say I am really a Free Range Parent   Maybe an Egg? Trying to hatch?

I try to employ non Helicopter Parenting, but am still taking babysteps. Before I had kids I thought yeah, I'll be cool and all.. then you have kids and your fears come in to play.

I try not to watch the kids in the back yard.
I let them play in the empty lot next door and lane occassionally ( I sneak looks so they dont know I am watching)
I have let Miss A (7) walk our neighbour two blocks to the neighbours ride to school, alone. ( I drive along later and pick up MissA)
The kids wander alone before and after church (not really alone as there is a bazillion people in the halls)
The Mr let the kids go to the fish and chip shop alone once - but I caved and made him go up after them after 5 mins!(In my defense its on a busy major road and weird people hang around up there - but the kids were MAD when he came to get them - I think it put back their trust in us that we trust them. Sad.)

So I can count these times on one hand!! Pretty sad really.

A Perfect Example

Just the other day, my neighbour took Miss A to walk up a waterfall at Mt Cootha. Yes - they walk up the river then up the rocks to the top of the falls. ( A little dangerous but it isnt too high) At the top my neighbour rested. The girls wanted to go 'further' along the river. She let them!!! Alone. As she was telling me this I got a bit anxious, like I didn't like it. But then I thought to myself - its good for the kids to explore alone... think positive!! . She said they came back and told her that they both did a wee in the bush as they needed to go to the toilet!! LOL LOL

The Mr likes to wax lyrical about when he was 10 he delivered newspapers. Alone. In the morning dark, In the middle of Melbourne Winters, with 4 layers of clothes and gloves on. Miss K is 9  - would I let her do the same thing next year?? NO WAY! and that is really a shame. Another shame is now apparently many of these types of things are no longer allowed to be done by people under 18 because of liability. Sad.


Now I don't want anything bad to happen to my children. No parent does. But things happen anyway. I used to discuss with The MR what would we do if an accident happend to our children in the care of someone else, or in the others care. We said we would not blame eachother or another.(well atleast try not to) I hope that may be the case if anything terrible ever befalls our kids.  In the old days people had 9 kids cause they knew 3 or more might die. There are so many bad things out in the world. I try to tell myself this. Reality is, something bad could happen to one of my kids. My own father died in  a car accident. Hit by a drunk driver. My mother was in worse condition (and pregnant with me) yet he was the one that died.
A few high profile recent kidnapping cases the parents were nearby. The kidnapping of Jaycee Duggard the one captive for 18 years her Dad saw it happen,  the girl in Salt Lake City, her parents were in the house. So perhaps these are freak of nature things that perhaps you can't really prevent.

Posts at free range parenting that I liked
What makes Finnish Kids Smart?
Why Sex Offender Registry's Don't Work
Mean World Syndrome
Why Anti Bacterial Gel isn't the answer
Ways for Kids to Volunteer
Why Boredom is good for kids
Example of a Perfect Free Range Childhood
Another Free Range Childhood told by child


So I wrote this post a week ago and never posted it.

I have implemented some more free range for the kids and it is going wonderful. It happend to co incide with our NO TV week, so that was perfect.  The older 3 girls have had to play outside each afternoon. I have let them go to the empty lot and in the lane without sneeking peeks at them, expecting them to look out for one another (they are so close that I can hear them though)

The older two have been to the park with a half hour limit and have done great! They came skipping home yelling out " WERE HOME" and were absolutely grinning in pleasure.

More playing on the path out the front of our house, riding up and down the street. Best to let everyone know who lives here! and maybe we can meet some other kids that way.

As stated in the above link  A child that is walked around the neighbourhood (by you) as a tiny infant and continued for years is the most safe child. A child that the neighbourhood knows, shop keepers, librarians etc,  a child that is able to walk around (when old enough) not one sequested in a house that has no chance to be known, is the safer child.

In today's world it is so hard to do this.

I know cause I spent the half hour my older girls went to the park biting my nails!

Anzac Cake

We usually make Anzac Biscuits leading up to Anzac Day.

I saw this recipe  for Anzac Cake  in a magazine and thought it sounded like a good twist on the usual.

I will say that I ate this cake warm and I did not like it. Tasted like a terrible sticky date pudding with oats in it. I was sad. I was really hoping for something good with this recipe. However I ate it the next day cold with a cup of milk and could not get enough! I think I ate five pieces that day and had to go buy more milk cause I drank it all. Cold - it was like a heavy sweet Oaty loaf. Yum.

Also I have never made a cake with so many eggs! That scared me a little :) I loved the use of caster sugar to coat the pan. It made a lovely sweet crunchy edge to the cake. Was delicious. I am going to do this to all my cakes from now on I think.


Anzac Day Cake
melted butter for greasing
caster sugar for dusting
125g unsalted butter
250g golden syrup
6 eggs
120g self raising flour  (I used 1 cup)
120g rolled oats  (i used 1 cup)
150g dessicated coconut (I used 1 cup)
80g icing sugar
1/4 cup caster sugar
1/4 cup dark rum  (I used water!)
cream to serve

METHOD

Preheat oven to 170c  line and grease a 23cm round cake tin, dust with caster sugar.

Melt butter and golden syrup in small pan over a low heat. Set aside to cool slightly, then beat in eggs.

Combine flour,oats,coconut and icing sugar in a bowl,stir in butter mixture.Spoon into prepared tin and bake for 20-25 mins or until a skewer inserted in centre comes out clean. Set aside for 5 mins.

Meanwhile bring caster sugar water to the boil, cook for 5 mins, then set aside.
Gently turn out cake onto wire rack to cool.

Serve drizzled with syrup and cream (I drizzeled the syrup all over the cake beforehand)




I think I prefer Anzac Biscuits more though, so I will make some this week! But this was a nice alternative.

Sabbath

Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. ~ 1 John 4:7

Happy Fortune

The local public telephone box

For an afterschool activity we wrote some loving messages on heart post it notes.

The two older girls were then allowed to go around the local area and leave little messages where they might give people a smile. I gave them a camera so they could take photos of places they left a message. I said try not to draw too much attention to yourselves.

So much fun - like secret agents.


We have done this before but the same way Nie Nie did here at her post Read Me Happy Fortunes  I loved her idea so much. Leaving happy little messages around town is so much fun. Go and try it.

You are loved

This one cracked me up! On the road crossing button!

Green Goo

My kids came up with the recipe for this. I found them in the kitchen with a bowl full of water and green food colouring. They poured in some vinegar and then were sprinkling in bi carb for the 'volcano' bubbly effect.

When they grew bored of that they said they wanted to make their water 'thicker' and went off looking for cornflour, only to find none. They then decided on flour, but I was able to talk them out of it.

I found an old small container of gelatine  - some leftover thing from some recipe years ago no doubt.

We spinkled in half the jar and watched and played as the green goo became thicker by the minute.

After a while they had the perfect goop.

It started as a swamp for toys. Then their hands ended up in it, then it started dripping - so I ordered them OUTSIDE goo, animals and all to play in the grass. They came back covered in green, I had a jiggily leftovers all over the bath (and they managed to drop the ceramic dish and smash it) but other than that this was a great sensory, fun activity. Instigated by them.

Table Talk

I was depressed about my table.

Really Sad.

I want a new one.

Half of the chairs are broken.

It's embarrassing really.

Most people I know and the blogs I read -  the people have beautiful tables.

With centrepieces. Or funky artwork, clocks or decorations  behind.


I'm in the thoughts of redesigning all our rooms. The loungeroom and dining most specifically. Changing styles, layouts, new furniture. Thinking alot about how to minimalise in this small house, yet live a fullfilling enriching life. We do want to live here. We do want to be able to do stuff and have things, yet have a sleeker look.

So I once again pointed out how disgusting and embarassing our table is to The MR

"But I love it this way, it's beautful" he said.

"Its our table. We use it. Alot. It shows marks of love and use.

He had to go and pull THAT card didn't he.


One of my favourite passages from 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families is about the kitchen table.

I cut out my wedding dress at the same place where I memorized my spelling words. It was the same place I ated cookies each day after school. It was there as I prepared for the SAT's. My husband to be was grilled mercilessly in the same spot. Much of what I have learnt and hold dear is inextricably intetwined with the kitchen table. That 4x6 scratched and worn piece of furniture was a small physical part of my home. Yet as I look back on what we did there, I realize that it was a key to the life I now have.


As I struggle each night to get dinner on my kitchen table and round up my children from the four corners of the neighbourhood, I wonder why I dont just send them to their rooms with a chicken pot pie and tv. I don't because I am giving them the gift of the kitchen table. Perhaps it is in the genes. Or perhaps it is that kitchen table. That magical place where I learnt responsibility and felt love and security.

There's something about a kitchen table.

Marianne Jennings - The seven habits of Highly Effective Families by Stephen Covey pg 282-283

A couple of years into being married we wanted a big table. A big one for our family and all that we planned to do around it. We got the biggest in the shop at the time. Its 110x210cm. We knew it would get used and abused, so decided on a wood one that could be sanded back and be repainted if it got too bad.

That was my choice at the time to. So now I should stick to it now.

That big old wooden table that has definately been abused.


Now where's that electric sander?    *looks around*



*and don't give me 'the table looks fine' rubbish. That photo makes it look good. It has nikko stains, blue, red and green paint that won't come off, purple bleeding tissue paper stains, a green holly leaf shape stain from christmas tinsel, carvings, a nikko teddy bear drawn on the top, circle drawings dug in by a ball point pen, knife and fork stabbings, bare patches where I scrubbed off other offending things and ended up scrubbing off the lacquer!!.. and the list goes on. Not to mention only four still together chairs out of 8.

A bit of fresh air

Now I know what you will look like in 70 years time.

Short, Chunky in a Soft cotton house dress and runners :)

On the last day of the holidays I took 5 kids to the museum and the art gallery.

There was this lovely interactive art instalment piece.

A pile of recyclable rubbish. It was huge. The kids were encouraged to make aeroplanes out of it.
The planes would then be displayed as part of the art.

Then there was this lovely room for quiet reflection.

With so many kids in and out, I don't know how quiet we were. But the girls managed these poses on their own.

But their favourite thing?

The air vents along the way. There are about 15 of these.

They knew from previous visits what these airvents can do.

Al`a Marilyn Monroe.

They did this for over 10 mins. Walking from one vent to the next. All 4 of them in a row.

The looks I got! Pointing, nods, smirks, whispers between friends.

But most people had a chuckle and thought the girls were hilarious..


Glad we could make other peoples day. Laughing at us, or with us I suppose


We all need a little fun now and then. And a bit of fresh air :)

Conference Catchup

Saturday Conference Afternooon:  at the park afterwards

An old Jewish legend tells of two brothers, Abram and Zimri, who owned a field and worked it together. They agreed to divide both the labor and the harvest equally. One night as the harvest came to a close, Zimri could not sleep, for it didn’t seem right that Abram, who had a wife and seven sons to feed, should receive only half of the harvest, while he, with only himself to support, had so much.

So Zimri dressed and quietly went into the field, where he took a third of his harvest and put it in his brother’s pile. He then returned to his bed, satisfied that he had done the right thing.


Meanwhile, Abram could not sleep either. He thought of his poor brother, Zimri, who was all alone and had no sons to help him with the work. It did not seem right that Zimri, who worked so hard by himself, should get only half of the harvest. Surely this was not pleasing to God. And so Abram quietly went to the fields, where he took a third of his harvest and placed it in the pile of his beloved brother.


The next morning, the brothers went to the field and were both astonished that the piles still looked to be the same size. That night both brothers slipped out of their houses to repeat their efforts of the previous night. But this time they discovered each other, and when they did, they wept and embraced. Neither could speak, for their hearts were overcome with love and gratitude.


This story made me reflect on a few things.

Love, Kindness and the whole Grass is greener on the other side. No matter who you are, where you are - You can always have a different perspective. It's time to step back and look at things as they really are. Should I think I deserve the things I do? Should I think of my fellow other as these two brothers did. Nothing is ever what it seems. Look deeply.
 
This story came from the awesome talk at conference by You are my Hands  By Dieter F Uchtdorf - I think he might be my favourite apostle :) That's if - you know, we had favourites :)

Mothers and Daughters  by  M. Russell Ballard was of course most fitting for me. A talk that will be looked at time and time again.

and though sad of topic, a timely reminder to Turn to the Lord by Donald L Hallstrom - If tragedy does befall us - where will we turn?

Even though I pretty much heard nil of conference (thanks to lovely squirmy girls) I am glad I can read online and read the ensign when it arrives.

See you next year

Goodbye Easter Holidays. See you next year. We had such fun. I almost don't want you to end.

 Please come again with good weather, family, chocolate, church and cuteness. We love you.

But even this bunny needs a rest.

Love

This Girl loves to Talk

Bed Wars

Sometimes I wish I could cover my room in super soft comfy mattresses.

The whole room.

Then we could all sleep in there.

No musical beds.

No crying out about  - bad dreams, sore legs, scared, thirst

No two hours at night rotating between rooms at bedtime. No reassurances needed at the cot, no laying on my bed with Miss G, no singing in another room to Miss A (the only person who will ever ask me to sing), chat time with Miss K, favourite books in different beds, waterbottles, tooth brushing and sometimes returnings - returned to their beds.


And think of what I could do with the spare rooms!

A study, Toy Room, Craft room.. the options are limitless.


When we had international students living with us the three girls shared a room.

I can't tell you the incredulous looks I would get from people when I said I had 3 in a room. When I was pregnant with number 4 I would joke 'can I squeeze 4 in a room?"  Pretty much amounts to child abuse these days. (Don't joke The Mr shared a room with his 3 brothers at one stage - two sets of bunks and he turned out ok :)

The girls didn't complain, in fact they were a little sad when I split them. They rarely went in their room except to sleep anyways. I don't have teenagers needing space trying to avoid us (yet!)

But as with everything I seem to suffer from split personality - I do like my space  so alas the dreams of a sumptous pillow filled room may go unfilled. Though I do know families who do it. I applaud them. I am secretly jealous. Because if I am going to get a visitor or two every few nights - I might as well have a BIGGER BED! A bed the size of the whole room!


Or if I had the money I would buy 4 of  these little beds   or these   or two of these as bunks   and line the girls up in one room ala` Madeline . -
`In an old house in Paris that was covered with vines lived twelve little girls in two straight lines.`



Ahh Bed wars - where would any parent be without them?


Really all I want is to hop in a bed for a long long time :)

Sabbath

Now was not this exceeding joy? Behold, this is joy which none receiveth save it be the truly penitent and humble seeker of happiness. ~ Alma 27:18

We are Family

Was lucky enough to get some photos by the wonderfully talented Zanabelle Photography at Easter. She's busy, yet kindly took time to take pity upon us. I might even book her next time :)
As you should do. Now.

Go to her Facebook Fan Page to check out lots of her beautiful work (People more attractive than us :)

Sandy Pants

All she wanted to do at the beach was eat it.
Over and Over again. Even when she realised she didn't like it.

And all her nappy's today have been similar. Full of sand. Over and Over again.

Mediocre?

Lay off the Parents already by Karen Maezen Miller - Glad  I read that post.


I have given up on feeling guity for parenting. (ok not really, but I try)


I studied Children and Families at university for a few subjects. I have read parenting books, I have been to a class or two.  There is a place for research and I recommend a few of the parenting books I have read. I recommend a class or two if you feel you need it. Gathering parenting ideas from others is helpful.

But sometimes I think that you know what's best for your children.   I know when I am not doing enough. I know. Everyday I make a mistake. And I will use prayer, study and good sense to try and steer my path right.

I might as well ask for forgiveness each day. Start the day with "I'm Sorry. Forgive me"


But what if I just want to raise mediocre kids?


Now that sounds terrible, but what if I just want to let them be. Within the right framework kids will raise themselves no?  "Honestly, how good does a good kid have to get?" Another quote from the above linked blog



However this line of thought is so difficult to have when others don't think the same way. I find myself in the hidden agenda game of 'your kid, my kid' comparisons with other mothers at school and in general. And it's hard not to join in sometimes.


We all want smart, athletic, beautiful, polite, kind, well adjusted children. But do we push them to be so?


My children do very little after school activities. As a family we go to Little Athletics friday nights for one season (Oct - March) The rest of the year we do nothing - We replace it with family movie night. I feel bad they aren't enrolled in Soccer, Netball, Swimming, Drama, Gymnastics, Dancing and the list goes on (the other kids at school are enrolled in these, some kids several things)


I feel bad that my 3 and half year old doesn't know letters, can't spell her name, can only count to 10. And sadly I don't think I do much to encourage her in this area. Though I heard somewhere that by the time a child is going to school you should have read a thousand books to them. I think I read a thousand books a year to them. I hope this is enough.  One of the few people who have calmed my fears in this area is my neighbour who is Swiss. She said in Switzerland children don't learn that type of stuff until 6-7 years of age. She didn't do anything formal until then with her daughter. Before that it is all outdoor play and imagination play.


Mothers comparing report cards. It's hard not to trump when your kids do good. But what does it mean in relation to life. My eldest daughter gets majority A's with a couple of B's. Second daughter gets B's with a couple of A's. That makes me happy, but what does it mean? That I have done good? That they were already bright kids, regardless? That I let them be? I honestly don't know. Plenty of smart people fail in life and plenty of not so smart succeed and do well.

Sometimes I want to keep them at home from extra curricular activities so the best thing they can learn is to rely on eachother. What's the good of having 3 sisters if you can't rely on them. I don't mind if they fight and push boundries with eachother but I want them to be friends. So I can know when I am gone - they will love eachother, respect eachother and lean on one another and have FUN together.

Our activities are eating together, playing together, watching movies together. 

That's enough isn't it?

I should write a book - Raising Mediochre children. Though I'll have to change the title - Mediocre has such bad connotations. Regular, Middle, Plain, Relaxed,  Mean Median Mode  - you know all those words that mean the middle. lol.

Words you read won’t transform your life. Words I write won’t transform my life. Only one thing transforms my life: practice ~ Karen Maezen Miller

I'm making my practice list of how I can be a better mother, as I type this. Seriously.

Eggsellent

Some Eggs from around the house.

The last one is me getting a carscerone smashed above my head. I need to make more next year

(we only made 8) as the kids smashed them too fast to get photos. One of our favourite traditions.

Sabbath

Who will gather his people even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, even as many as will hearken to my voice and humble themselves before me, and call upon me in mighty prayer

~ D&C 29:2

Buns and Bunnies

Whipped up 3 of these last night to go in the girls Easter Baskets for tomorrow (we do the chocolate thing early to leave Sunday for the Spiritual) these are found at Purl Bee and were extremely easy. Miss K even made her own version. I like to include a few non edible things in their baskets.

Good Friday morning was spent making these Hot Cross Buns. Recipe found at Taste.com. The girls said they would like to try a choc chip version. I would have happily complied if I had some choc chips. They ate these lovely Currant filled ones anyway though. Filled the house with a lovely smell. I should have added more spice though I think. I happily ate mine with a big glass of milk.

I was actually contemplating that I wanted my girls to "Do something Good" on Good Friday. Doesn't that sound like a good family tradition? Helping others, giving to others. Doing service on Good Friday.  Well in the end I didn't come up with anything until The MR reminded me that our family has to clean half the church once a week for a month - so we spent an hour or two cleaning the church - wiping, vaccuming, cleaning toilets, dusting, throwing away rubbish. I think our Good was accomplished today.

Happy Easter

How thoughtful of my friend who gifted me a 1kg solid bunny :)

Elanda Point

200 photos, 50 mosquito bites, 7 animals, 6 trips to the lake, 3 days, 1 memorable trip

We had our first extended family camping trip. It was so much fun. I recommend having 5 adults around to wrangle a baby. Not to mention take turns cooking, cleaning, canoeing, swimming with the kids and trips to the showers and bathrooms. I even read a book! (Harry Potter and the Philosphers Stone - finally got around to it - slow I know!)

Our little shanty town

As my brother and I were watching the kids play at the lake I said Good behaviour in children is directly linked to all distractions being removed from parents. It's surprising how good kids are when you have no housework, no washing, no chores (apart from eating and washing dishes) no computer, no paperwork, no craft etc. This was another aha parenting moment for me. It will be good for the family and for the soul to retreat from hectic life more often.

We found a clay pit. A favourite activity was to cover themselves and their uncle in clay

Stalking Kangaroos, Goanna's, ducks, kookaburra's were other favourite activities.

Getting up for the sunrise was mine. I love to do that atleast one day while on holiday. It is just so peaceful at sunrise. There are no words to describe the beauty of the earth at that time. I snuck away and Miss A woke up in the tent alone with the baby and worried where I was.

The thing the older girls were most excited about was adult propelled surfing! Miss A discovered it first and Miss K would not rest until she had learnt. Who wants to be showed up by their younger sister! The only problem was they never wanted to stop - but these poor adult bodies could only do it for so long. My legs felt like jelly afterwards! Maybe I need to do it more often! lol lol! We wisened up and hired a canoe and pulled them around on the back of that too.

And what did baby think of it? I think she gave it a thumbs up! She loved all the attention showered on her by the adults and she loved swimming in the lake. She slept pretty good too so she must have liked sleeping in the tent too.

I totally recommend Elanda Point for camping with families. The lake is only about 50cms deep for a few kms. The deepest it gets is 1.5 m. The kids entertained themselves in the shallow water. The only downside was absolutely no fires in the park. The girls had been looking forward to roasting marshmallows. They love campfires so were very sad about there being no fire allowed. They made several 'fake' fires with sticks they collected.

 

We even saw a beautiful rainbow while we were there! Luck must have been smiling upon us.

I survived my first camping trip in quite a few years. I might go again :)