Thou Shalt not covet other peoples blogs

*avoiding the paparazzi*

Yeah so I totally have blog envy.


It can be bad for ones esteem to read other creative/crafty/montessori/homeschooling/tree hugging hippy type blogs. I have decreased the amount I read - but it's too addictive, Like I don't want to miss out on all the awesome ideas (that will probably never get used, just compiled :S) And I would rather envy those type of people than movie stars, celebrities etc anyway.


I feel like I haven't done a proper craft with my kids since Miss N was born. (Christmas excluded) and sadly I think they might be happy. Happy that hours of TV and computer are part of their lives.



I feel like a failure. One of my favourite kids ideas blogs Chasing Cheerios often makes me sad. Her two girls are the same age as my two youngest. Hers seem like geniuses compared to my kids. All those montessori games are paying off.! I was so happy when she did a post this week about 'things I don't do well'. I felt like a hero - I excel greatly in some areas she does not.


This blog world is a revolving circle though, because people have said the same about me. They feel guilt over my blog! Guilt over ME? Don't do it!! When someone says to me that they love my blog and what a wonderful, relaxed, organised, crafty mum I am... I think... NOOOOOOOO It is soooo far from the truth. (But keep up the praise cause I secretly love it)



Hopefully I blog enough about lifes difficulties and not just life's pinnacles



'Cause blog life is fake



Well I hope all those copious amounts of perfect people blogs are fake


Those Fakey Mc Fakes



otherwise.... The truth is I really just am a lost cause.

***

And As a special gift to all my wonderful readers

The Oft Quoted ..... "Lucky Holly" ...... is opening her blog up to you

(I feel like oprah offering up her favourite things)

A once in a lifetime opportunity to read "Lucky Holly" (whose blog is private)

is open to you for ONE WEEK!!

You know she was recently a movie star (read an extra on a commercial) - get the inside goss!
And click through to my favourite labels of hers at the bottom of the page: Cheaper than therapy, mama thoughts, tongue firmly in cheek, taste it.

'Cause she is definately the real deal. Not fake at all.

and neither am I

... well only half the time

*click here to go directly to Lucky Holly

Dreams

I have a recurrent themed dream.

Each time it may be different but the premise is the same

Last night I was trying to get to The MR's work. He has a series of secrets ways to go that avoid roads/time consuming lights etc. In my dream I was caught up in elevators, different buildings trying to take the short cuts to get to him.

Basically in these dreams I do the same thing over and over and there is always something preventing me accomplishing what it is I am trying to do, or stopping me getting where I want to go.

Other times the dreams have been

I was at school and could not find my school bag. So I look and look and look

I parked my car, walked a few streets did whatever it was I had to do, then went to walk back to my car,but end up walking for ages saying, the car was just here. I walk and walk and walk and start freaking out that I wont be back in time to get my kids from school

I was at my parents, in my sisters wardrobe trying to find something to wear. I pushed hanger after hanger, not finding what it was that I needed. None of the pieces matched. So I just stood in the cupboard flipping through the hangers

I have been in school and not had my timetable, wandering around looking for a classroom

Sometimes I even wake up tired from these dreams!

Think I have issues much?

Normally I read nothing into my dreams. I don't even remember most of my dreams. I really don't think they mean anything. But now that I have had several dreams were I am doing the same thing over and over, or trying to reach somewhere but not being able to I am starting to think I need to look into it.

Am I unfulfilled?

Is there something I am searching for?

Something subconsciously out of reach?

Want to dream analyse me?

Sabbath

Whom having not seen, ye love; in whom, though now ye see him not, yet believing, ye rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory ~ 1 Peter 1:8

A Perfect Child

I was a perfect child.

It's true. My mother told me.

So when our children are wild and crazy (umm that would be everyday) I blame The MR.

Because his mother has told me he was not a perfect child.

***

You know - I like to read. I like to sit and be quiet. I like things clean.

So when I imagined my beautiful children to be why did they not turn out like this?

It's not like I go screaming through the house all day, whining and complaining and making a mess.

Why do they not learn from my example?

Sometimes it seems they have inherited the worst parts of our personalities. They are loud, they talk to much, they aren't patient, they can't sit still, they have weird clothing ideas, they don't listen.

Before we had kids we used to joke about what they would turn out like. We took the best parts of our bodies to create the perfect looking child. We took the worst parts of us to create the most not perfect child

The Perfect child would have

My sight (The MR is blind)

His Teeth (I had braces (and my teeth are still crooked) and he did not)

My height (We are the Exact same height )

My hair (the Mr went bald at 21)

His Smile

His Hands

His Warmth (he is ALWAYS hot, and I am nearly always cold!)

My brains :)

If we took the bad parts that run in our family and put them together we would have a:

Red headed, glasses wearing, freckly faced, crooked/buck toothed, short, bald,

big sticky outy ears, mumbling child.

I bet that child would have had the perfect personality :) and caused me no trouble

It's all payback right? I really did bring this upon myself. It makes me sad that they may behave the way they do because of me. I need to be better, more consistent, more challenging, a better teacher.

And I revel in the fact that one day my girls will get payback too.

Refined

The other night I dreamt (I think I was in a half dreaming half awake comatose state) what my One Word Should be. It was after I ran into someone who was here on holiday whose blog I read. I do know this person kinda - only one degree of seperation in this church no? But we don't really know know each other. Anyways I was having like a FAN moment.

As soon as I saw her I was like I know her, I love her blog, OH her kids look exactly like they do online... (I may have freaked them out a bit, by talking to them like I know them )... Any way I had a bit of a Celebrity Rush as she called it (such a good description!)

I was so impressed with how elegant and refined she was. Softly sweetly spoken, attentive and a good listener, very well dressed, beautiful makeup and hair and in awesome killer heels and wearing Stockings!! I dont even own a pair of stockings!! Her children were beautiful, polite and Oh so sweet and clean and neat (unlike my wild children)

Anyway I was contemplating all this in my sleep apparently and it came to me - what my word for the year should be

Refined

This year I want to become a more refined person. A good goal for someone in their 30's. Its probably high time I cleaned myself up. I am no longer a child. It also makes me think of the scriptures - A refiners fire.

I want to refine :

My speech

My attentiveness

My appearance

My home

My children

My relationships

My learning

A streamlining of sorts.

Keeping the best and throwing the rest.

30's is the new Black

This time last year I had morning sickness. Terrible morning sickness and pretty much missed out on the delight that is Christmas and my Birthday.

How can one commemorate the milestone that is 30 while feeling like death warmed up? So I didn't. I lazed on the couch and my family took me out for some wonderful Thai food.
And. That. Was. It.

Well I decided that this year, I was ready to admit it, ready to sink comfortably into saying

"I am now Officially in My 30's"
*phew, I said it*

Not that there is anything wrong with the 30's - many people say it is the best decade in your life - I am happy to agree, This decade can be all about me! It's just that I fear - I now have to grow up!
Even though my body might be ageing.. I think my mind got left behind, for I am yet to Mature!

I accomplished a few things in my 20's.

I got married
I finished my degree
Had 4 kids

Went in a plane for the first time
Went Overseas for the first time
Moved 5 times

Taught Seminary

Was a bishops wife

So what shall I accomplish in my 30's?

Any suggestions?

Of course I would be remiss if I didn't mention the MR. We kinda share birthdays. The fact that he has also been with me, my entire 20's makes it even more special. I actually don't mind sharing birthdays with him. (I hope he doesnt mind either) We share everything else, it feels kinda special to have our birthdays together too.

We went shopping and to Vapiano for dinner, walked home in the twilight from the city, to an house devoid of the big girls (THANKS GRANDMA!) I was up early the next day with Miss N, but went back to bed and slept till 10am !! Unheard of!! That hasn't happened in 10 years either.

And to end the day I sat around on the deck eating chocolate pretending to comiserate with friends that I am now in my 30's... we ate and laughed till midnight.

And thats when the last minute of my 20's ended, and I was now officially

In my 30's.

And Miss N may have indulged in her first food whilst she joined us on our birthday date.. She wasn't giving up that Pizza Crust for anything!!

Rollin'

I still got the moves ~ I can still skate in a straight line, skate backwards and do turning crossovers

I might have attempted speed skating if it hadn't been atleast 10 years or more since I last skated :)

Maybe I should take up Roller Derby :D

That's one way to take out that built up Mothering/Stay at Home Mum Aggression!

Last week I learnt that:

I can carry a three year whilst wearing rollerskates

I can take a three year old to the toilet whist both she and I are wearing rollerskates

I can survive (barely) taking 4 children rollerskating all on my own

Having a large family means breaking many rules - when your with one kid surely the others are getting up to mischief - we got in trouble for both the carrying of children whilst wearing skates - a big no no apparently (I felt like telling the 16 year old boy you deal with a three year old having a melt down who really needed to be picked up) and whilst I was skating with a six year old who was begging me to skate along with her the three year old repeatedly broke the rules of climbing up on the rink edge - another big no no - we were given death stares by the 16 year old worker repeatedly

The hire skates are the exact same ones from when I used to skate 16 years ago... eeewwwww

My girls were the ONLY ones in the entire place who thought wearing skirts while skating was a good idea - maybe they are closet 'roller dolls'

Those pristine 'white boot' skates and speed skates behind the glass display still make swoon - who wants the ugly brown 'hire skates'?

Basically I am just glad I lived through this experience and that I didn't end up on my rear with a broken hip/leg/arm/knee/insert body part here.



Next time I'm leaving the kids at home.

World Peace

Ahhh the short hair days... I wish i had my childhood photo of when I had hair like a boy to put up here.

I'm feeling like I have had medium length brown hair forever....

I desperately want to cut it off, but it's almost reached the bottom of my shoulder blades.....
I desperately want long hair so I can toss it left and right too....


oh the dilemma's


A nice short cut for my birthday?
For summer?
Or to save my babies life ~ which ever reason.



My hair has been falling out in clumpfulls with this baby (happens every time, but seems worse this time - she will have to be the last or I'll have no hair left... not to mention all the hair I'm gonna be pulling out as they grow older ;)

And every hour of every day I am picking hair off her. From between her fingers, between the fat folds of her chubby legs, from her nappy - what the? and most annoyingly from tightly wound around her neck! Decapitation by your mothers hair is not a good way to die!



I seem to cut my hair short every two years. Some times it coincides with having a baby, sometimes it just happens to be my birthday (a good way to spend that birthday cash from mum and nanna - the only time I have cash to spoil myself) and sometimes cause I have JUST HAD ENOUGH...



Ok... one more year.. I'll give it one more year.. because I got this far didn't I ~ seems to be a recurring theme in my life.. I get bored and give up!!

Long Hair it is - anyone got hot curlers?

'Cause I need some bounce so I can throw around this long hair I'm gonna have.

While I am at it (growing hair.. takes work you know...) I might join This Facebook Hair Protest for peace. Lucky Holly bought this issue to my attention. This is a group for those who wish to peacefully protest the war in Iraq by simply growing out your hair until the war is declared over


might as well focus this hair energy somewhere -



and as all the best models know - the answer is always

"WORLD PEACE"

Yes.. That Time of Year...

To Resolute or Not to Resolute that is the QUESTION

Should I make some New Year Resolutions?

I don't usually. I mean I'll just break them, so whats the point? I do usually have a little think over about some things that COULD be resolutions..... you know that's IF I made resolutions. Plus there are all those people that ask what your resolutions are. Honestly it could be the same list every year.


I have read on various blogs - of just using a word for the year. One Word to work on. Your focus can be big or small - thats the great thing about a one word resolution. Words like Change, Joy, Awareness... etc. I came across this Awesome Post on Resolutions at christine Kane and you should totally read it. Go there now and then come back :) Check out her list of words to choose from - there are some good ones. I am gravitating towards choosing ONE of the following:

Delight * Savor * Listen * Release

Christine states the reason most resolutions don’t work is that they address only one level of your life. The DO level. It’s the DO-HAVE-BE model. “I will DO this thing.” (i.e., Lose weight) “So I can HAVE this other thing” (Self-Esteem) and I can BE this thing. (Confident.)

The average New Year’s Resolution doesn’t address the core of the issue – the “BE” level.
The best order for creating positive changes in your life is the BE-DO-HAVE model.

Now... WHAT DO I WANT TO BE???

More food for thought, I just pulled out the family mission statement for closer perusal. The Beginning of the year is a good time for that too. Several years ago we made a family mission statement. We Chose ONE word, a Subheading and how to achieve both.

PEACE

Love at Home


Follow Christ * Humbly Pray * Actively Listen * Seek Knowledge

Encourage Others * Respect Self * Search Scriptures

Speak Softly * Have Fun * Find Humour
Seek Wisdom * Accept Responsiblity

Do Good * Speak Kindly


I just saw the date on the bottom of the laminate card and it said June 2000 - 10 years ago!! Perfect to resurrect for the year 2010!


Maybe choosing to Simplify my Resolutions will help me achieve more things.

If I can just Be - I can change

***

Here is the real *not simplified* list if I could be bothered :)

I could try to give up eating (highly doubt it)- I could try to lose weight (don't need to - lack of car has stripped me of 5kg) - I really need to tone up ( possible goal but babysitting support is negligible) - Every year I say I will read my lesson materials for Sundays (please one day will I do this?) - A study routine for Scripture reading (is another must) - Career prospects? (when the baby is grown) - A Cleaner house (nah, I'll never suffer from OCD and might as well face it) - More Dates with the MR (yes please) - Still waiting on that Pedicure ;) - A Skin Routine so I don't look like a raggedy bag lady with four kids (started that thanks to a lovely christmas present from Karyn) - Deep Self Analysis - More Sewing (I have 2 quilts needing to be finished)

Phew.. I think that is enough for a year!

Have Yourself A Merry Wet -y Christmas

Christmas This year has been all about being WET! It has rained nearly every day, but the sun still comes out thank goodness! We have been swimming with cousins rain and shine ( I think they swam for about 15 hours over two days) To the beach where a big black cloud threatened but turned into blue skies minutes later and today we had flooded gutters on the street.

Perhaps our novelty umbrella's were the best Christmas present of all?

Grandparents Christmas Dinner

Our special Christmas Tradition - Both sets of Grandparents over for a party.

The girls were excited all day - and wanted to eat all the treats all day too! It is so hard to say "DONT EAT ANYTHING IN THE FRIDGE... IT IS ALL FOR TONIGHT!

We love grandparents dinner even when the girls get so hyped it makes them misbehave, and that they didn't even eat the dinner! They just want the sparkling Grape and Apple Drink :)

But Thanks to The MR - US ADULTS enjoyed Rib Eye Fillet, Salmon Steaks, Marinated Chicken, Corn on the Cob, Asparagus, and thanks to me we enjoyed Potato Salad, Ambrosia Salad, Garden Salad and Cupakes with Warm Chocolate Sauce, Berry Jus and Vanilla Icecream

Was so full, I had to roll to bed :)

Thanks be to the grandparents who make it all worthwhile :)

Twelfth Day of Christmas - Sabbath

my true love gave to me

a reminder of the reason for the season.

8 Years ago some friends came to our house, read The polar Express and gave us a beautiful homemade card with a red bow and a picture of the Saviour. They drew an analogy from the end of the polar express "Though I've grown old, the bell still rings for me as it does for all who truly believe" ~ and they likened it to ones testimony of the Saviour. They asked if our belief and testimony still shone as bright today as it did when we first came to the knowledge of the truth. It must have spoken to me as I can still rememeber it, whilst I have forgotten other gifts.



Over the years I thought that our Christmas Tree didn't bear enough witness of what the whole meaning of Christmas is about. Apart from the star on top or a nativity set we didn't have much that was celebrating the birth of Jesus.


These ornaments are made from cutting out pictures of Jesus from years of Ensign Magazines and from Deseret Catalogues (perk of previously owning a LDS bookstore) Likewise you could just print a desired picture of your chosing from the internet. (I dont have a colour printer, so haven't been able to use this method.) I ususally mount on black card and white paper. Print a scripture on white paper, tape together, laminate and add a bow.

I have literally made 100's of these over the years (and only have 3 left!) to be given away at Relief Society Meetings and classes, added to Christmas baskets, accompaning The Nativity DVD , around the neck of a bottle of maison, attached as a bow on the outside of a present.

I hope to convey to my children the real meaning of Christmas, and that it is faith, hope and love in the Saviour that can bring peace to us ~ which is the greatest gift one can ever recieve

Sneek Peek

Each year it's all about the place settings. I have done painted terracotta pots - named with lollies inside, gold painted river rocks - named with black writing, 3D White card(as seen in the header above), Ferrero Rocher Trees, Cookie Trees.

This years idea came from Kids Craft Weekly - Cardboard Peg Trees. The kids could help make these and they were very easy. We painted carboard triangles green using our fingers (we have lost all our paintbrushes! I need to get to the shops one of these days) and glued on some sequins and punched stars. Add a wooden peg and write on name. They do stand up but fall over easily if bumped. I might use a little blu tac to keep them up or...


just lay it on the plate like this - still cute I think. The trees are about 10-15 cms tall.

This is what happens if you leave to go check on your baby you forgot about - minutes later miss G had completely covered arms and face :)

Eleventh Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me...

Christmas Luminaries

The Mr and I have a new addiction. Chilled bottled Cherries with Vanilla Yoghurt. Its divine! And this equals an overabundance of Jars that I can't bear to throw out!

So I thought it was time to use some up. This idea was sparked by the many Halloween glass jar luminaries I saw around the net.

Basically paint on a jar! The other way is gluing tissue paper on to jars (that was how the snowman and star one were made)

Be careful around small children once lit. The glass became very hot quite quickly. A looking at only - NO TOUCHY!!

We used ours as a table centre piece outside when we had friends over for dinner this week.

and I had to include this! Miss G about bent herself in circles to paint around the jar, it was funny. She was almost flat on the table at one stage. It was a good exercise in painting something that isnt flat on the table.

Perfect Christmas

I had another epiphany this week.

It came in the form of a Better Homes and Gardens Magazine Actually.*see at end*

We all want a perfect Christmas. And some times we can feel sad or upset with ourselves when it doesn't turn out that way. I know I have lists and ideas of different things and traditions I want to do with my girls. I know I feel discouraged sometimes.

***

I want to take gorgeous pictures of us decorating the tree - but it is REALLY hot in my house and all I end up with is pictures of sweaty, red faced us, with clothes optional on the kids.

I want to go carolling to friends and up and down my street, but alas I cannot sing (and don't even try the sure you can - all people can sing line... I REALLY CANNOT!)

I want to sit around a piano at home with my family belting out carols till our hearts content except no one plays an instrument here (though the girls are learning SLOWLY because they never practice) and the girls may have inherited my bad singing :)

I want a beautifully decored house, strung with lights and boughs of holly

I want Dinner parties with wonderful food and perfect place settings

I Love gorgeously wrapped boxes, and want to fill my house with presents

I want to bake decadent sweets and treats (still too hot to bake and too expensive for ingredients)

I want to be organised and send wonderful homemade cards to every friend and family

I want a christmas crockery set for 8 people

But as it came to me in the form of the editors letter in BHG

IT TIS BUT A DREAM

Because if a team of professionals with uneding budgets take over 6 months and still struggle to get it right........ Then who am I to be able to compete?

We shall have to be happy

with love

with family

with hot sticky summer nights

with things made from meager budgets

with mismatched wonkily wrapped presents

with bad singing

and simple meals

Sounds like a PERFECT CHRISTMAS to me

*Paraphrased Editors Letter from December Better Homes and Gardens*

You know of course that we begin our Christmas planning somewhere in July to have everything ready for you when gorgeous old Christmas comes around for real.

Then comes the cover. Take a look at our exquisite christmas Tree. Each lovely decoration has to earn its place in relation to shape and colour with its neighbour. Half an hour or more is spent on getting EACH bow tied just right around the gifts. But you know each year someone plays up. And this year it was the cheeky butterfly in the red circle. It just refused to hang correctly. It took 3 HOURS to get him right.

It takes a week or more to get our words just right, to say what we need to tell you as warmly as we can. We had 26 variations (of the magazine) this time. Then, we finally begin to think it's our best offering, we print it!

Holidays

Sleeping Under the Christmas Tree; watching too much TV; Let the Holidays Begin

Tenth Day of Christmas

My true love gave to me...

peg doll angels for me..

Easy... and loved by little girls. Take some wooden pegs (the round head doll variety) and draw a face on. Hot glue gun a square of fabric around. Glue on some hair. Tie a knot in some tule, glue on the back. Perfect for little ones to carry around, or as I have done stand them up on the Christmas tree between their 'legs'

Ninth Day of Christmas

my true love gave to me ....

a photo card worthy of hanging....

or this more realistic one :)

I am the Queen of Christmas Photo Shoot Epic Fails.

I CAN NOT seem to get all my kids to smile at the same time.

I love those christmas Card Post Cards that you can order with warm christmas message to send to all your friends and family.

But being the do-it-myself kind of gal I am (*cough cough* CHEAP) I have wanted to make some myself.

Design a card and print them off at the photo booth for 14 cents each. Last year I did a few designs - But never got around to printing them. So friends and family had to do with the email version.

This year I have actually printed some, but have yet to send... So all of you wishing for a card from me.. keep holding your breath.. but perhaps if you are lucky.. your dreams MIGHT come true this year ;)

If you dont get one - Consider this your Christmas card :D

I saw this idea on the net months ago as a Fathers day photoshoot. All the grandchildren were rounded up and held up one letter each and they spelt out Grandad. It twas adorable.

So I picked out a font I liked, printed the letters N,L,O,V,E very large and traced them onto some cardboard (thick, from a box) I Cut them out and painted them red.

I got each child to pose with all the letters one at a time and then I went through all the photos, to find the best ones of each child.

Open photo in photoshop or an editing program. Make 2 layers of the same photo. Convert the top photo/layer to black and white. Use the eraser icon to 'rub out' the photo where you want the colour to show through. Arrange photos in order to spell words. I chose NOEL and LOVE as they had four letters.

Send in the mail as a postcard or included with your family Christmas letter/card.

Just because she is the best/quietest model in the house :)

go here to see just some of the 100's of photo fails I have done over the years Christmas Photo Bloopers

Never Stop Playing

Last night we had a dinner party with some 6 friends. Friends that didn't have any children. As I was preparing the girls for the evening (warning/begging/pleading for them to behave)

I had this actual conversation with Miss A

A: Why do adults like to talk so much?

Me: We just do

A: Why? Why do you like to talk

Me: Well there comes a time when you prefer to talk to your friends rather than just play with them

A: I will NEVER stop playing

A: You never want to play mummy

Me: Sure I do

A: Some people play tennis

Me: I don't have a tennis racquet or a court

A: Well just go to one

Me: alright


so ok busted I dont like to play with my kids - and now I have a baby to feed every 3 hours it seems like I am merely a spectator these days. There has been WAAAAYYYYY too much tv watching and being on the computer (can I help it if I am talented enough to be able to breastfeed and type on the computer at the same time - Might as well do two things at once, no?)



I want to get them to the age where we can do things together without too much disaster.

But that would mean playing with them now, so they might actually want to be with me later.

Now.. don't get me wrong.. I am silly... I like to muck around....I read and sing to my kids every night... but I am going to have to make a more structured goal to play with my children more.


Should be easy since School Holidays start next week.


6 LONG WEEKS of playing



Tennis anyone?



These thoughts made me think of a fantastic post by BEV about Avoiding Motherhood
Who would do such a thing?? Oh thats right.. ME ..... go read it :)

Sabbath

But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith
~ Galatians 5:22